Day 48: Difficult Daughter - Devoted Daughter

Mom - you must have known this post was coming...

I have some very distinct (and appalling) memories of being a horrible daughter. I was never so deceptively clever, just mean and cruel (oh the shame!!) I'm sure you remember the tantrums I threw before the carpool or the sobs of "you're ruining my life" and "it isn't fair!" when I couldn't hang out with high school boys. gaah! you were SUCH a mean mother!



(tsk! check out my 'tude in this pic!)

I remember being angry and resentful because you "just didn't understand" because how could you?!? It all seems so silly now.

Before Johnny left on his mission he told me it was time to forgive you and just love you. I thought he was crazy. I was convinced that you and I would never understand each other - no way would we ever be friends. isn't that so sad?

I know that you and I both remember well a special night we had in your room. It was a night I will treasure and remember forever. It changed my life, Mom. Do you know that deep down I always wanted to be good and do good? Why I wasted so much energy and time pretending to be angry and indifferent, I'll never know. thank you for being patient with me. thank you for not throwing up your hands and saying "you're right!" or "Fine!" or "Go ahead - see if I care!"

Although I couldn't see it while I was younger, I know you must have been scared to death seeing some of my friends and worried I might share a similar fate. I knew you loved me because even though I put up a fight, it didn't have much fire behind it because i didn't really want to be doing any of those things. I guess i just needed someone to give me those boundaries and (essentially) an excuse to have to stay home.



Since that night many years ago, I have treasured the bond we now share. You are my best friend, mom. My most trusted advisor and confidante. Could any daughter wish for a better mother? Could any person hope for a better friend? I hope that I can continue to put to rest the memory of difficult daughter and have you see what a devoted daughter i am to you now. I love you, I love you, I do.

maria

Day 23: Mother Never Knew

Our family has used the same photographer, Dave Newman, for many photo shoots. He always asks us to say "Mother never knew..." instead of "Cheese!", and then mom closes her eyes for the shot.

I wonder how many things mother really did know that we thought she never knew. You know? I compiled a quick list of my dirty doings. Mom, tell me if any of these are a surprise. I don't have any pics of me getting caught in the act, but this picture reminds me of all of the kids doing super stretch acrobatics off the kitchen counter to reach the treats above the fridge. Nice try hiding those mom!



My "Mother never knew" list. Mother never knew I...

1. Cut holes in my new Sunday pants because I was mad at her.
2. Sprayed windex on our bathroom light bulbs because I thought it looked cool when they exploded.
3. Wore Bob's diapers when I was 10 one day for extra padding (and for the heck of it) to do acrobatics in the front yard with John.
4. Made John and Mary eat cat and dog food even though they were just playing pretend
5. Added extra zeros to a babysitting check from Debbie Nelson. Got busted by the bank.
6. Used to sneak boxes of jello to eat in our play-chalet finger dip-n'-lick style.
7. Faked a fall in the shower to stay home from school (Jim had fallen that same morning... Mom gave us both the benefit of the doubt).
8. Squeezed mustard into loafers and spit snot into the pockets of sweatpants on the rack at VF Factory Outlet.
9. Got busted by a mall cop for stealing.
10. Hid between her mattress and box spring after I woke up surly from a nap. "She probably wouldn't even notice me if I was gone forever" I thought in self pity. Mom came looking for me and I stayed hidden. I only emerged after mom formed a search party of family and neighbors that called around for 15 minutes outside. I was satisfied with the effort. Thanks Mom.

After creating this list, I'm afraid for the parenting years to come. As an adult I often hear people comment "How did all of the LeBaron kids turn out so great?" Those people should read this post, and they'll realize it wasn't all roses. Thanks for putting up with us for so many years mom.

Now, as my challenge to the siblings, in-laws and grandkids... confession time. What did Mother never know? Fess up.